Discordian house blessing

I’ve been working on memorizing my lines for The Scottish Play. Thankfully, almost all of them were written in verse. Thank you, Bill. It’s like memorizing music. But I do find that I’m occasionally interspersing lines from a Discordian house blessing which I picked up in the early ’90s. I think it’s the iambs. I have no way to credit it, except to say it’s copyrighted 9987 O.L.W. May it please Eris.

Eris Bless This House

This house be safe from tygers wild,*
Here only tame things domiciled:
No bogle, troll, or grinch allowed,
Nor motley mob nor creeping crowd.
Bless everything within these walls,
No matter if it sits or crawls.**
Let mild weather be inside,
For those who ‘neath this rooftree bide;
And too, if not enlightenment —
Then pizza,*** love, and merriment…
And if these lines seem slightly odd,
Be glad at least they mostly rhyme.

* Lions, leopards, and armadillos not covered
** Certain crawling things require additional coverage
*** Extra cheese, unlimited toppings on Tuesdays

One Response to Discordian house blessing

  1. chappleos says:

    Eris Bless this house:

    Let this house be safe from quite and peace
    let in dreariness and silence only twice a week
    on weekdays let the wild rumble loose
    and don’t neglect my ever-growing pile of shoes
    fills these walls with pleasure soft and rough
    not to mention breaking stuff
    in a storm i want to live
    though sometimes restfulness you can give
    the apple tree is heavy and ripe
    so let’s go insane, let’s start a fight.

    Hail Eris.

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