On the Aortic Insertion Bus

Last night I was trapped in a stuffy room for 5 hours with about 12 loud actors torturing me with hilarious jokes told in loud voices and with perfect delivery. The horror…the horror.

We were making a video for Cook, Inc to show in Rome “and nowhere else.” How’s that for fame? Cook made a donation to the BPP in exchange for our “talents.”

We started in a bus, all yelling, “Get on the AI bus!” This was to kick off the video, which is allegedly a music video that puts new words to The Who’s overrated “Magic Bus.” We then were called out in groups of 3 or 4 to do little bits like put a piece of equipment in a FedEx package (while discussing Robert Plant’s anti-charisma).

My favorite bit was when six of us acted as Cook sales associates and whipped out our cell phones simultaneously. Since this is a music video, we could say whatever we wanted. I told the non-existent person on my cell all about our trip to the Coliseum and the bloody gladiatorial combat we’d seen there (I’ve been watching Rome episodes). Bad monkey.

My favorite joke of the evening, and the only one I remember, has to do with a dyslexic person and a license plate. Based on the salty language we indulged in all night, you can draw your own conclusions, but I swear this is a clean joke.

Exhausting but fun, with a terrific group of people of whose acting abilities I stand in awe. Thanks, Cook!

(I stumped the room with Uncle Bob’s doggerel. It was the only silence we had all night.)

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